It’s sick. It’s disturbing. It’s a bit nauseating.

It’s my favorite work to date!

I spent HOURS at my sponsor, The Mountain Lakes Market, on Saturday. Most of that time was brainstorming and plotting future work, but the most productive time went into creating a Lady Gaga portrait from ketchup, mustard and mayonnaise. Clearly, I am condimental.

To start, I drew a rough sketch to get the lines down. Once satisfied, I traced my original drawing on a piece of wax paper, because the mess of old lines, half-erased marks and mistakes would do nothing but confuse the hell out of me when the time to produce the final product came around. (I did all this earlier in the week.)

I brought the wax sketch to the Market, unfurled it on my self-proclaimed work bench in the basement/storage area, and went to town with a triumvirate of squirt bottles.The work paid off, and I’m so happy I could die, especially because I am addicted to Lady Gaga. For serious. I once danced atop an East Village bar when “Bad Romance” played, only to have a handful of sorority girls toss dollar bills at me. Some other bar banned all Lady Gaga from their jukebox, supposedly after I abused the machine with a night of The Fame Monster. (Incidentally, artwork from that album is the source material for this “painting.” I happen to think Gaga looks absolutely gorgeous in the photo – the real one.)

Possibly my favorite photo ever. I've already blown this up and plan on hanging it up in my apartment, my office, my parents' house, and the other places I frequent, like Trader Joe's and the Lincoln Square AMC Theatre.

I even love the way the deconstruction of this piece came out! Oh Gaga, you can do no wrong.

TOMORROW: Pee-Wee Herman!

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